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Today, January 31, 2026, marks what would have been the 63rd wedding anniversary of my beloved parents, Dr. T.M.B. and Vijaya. They tied the knot in 1963 in Trichy, Lalitha's hometown, embarking on a journey that shaped not just their lives but mine and those of generations to come. Though Dad passed away on August 15, 2017, and Mom on April 1, 2021, their presence lingers in every corner of my world. As the years since their marriage align with this poignant milestone—63 years—I find myself reflecting on their profound influence. It's a legacy I've carried forward to my own family, including my wife Lalitha, and our children Shravan and Radha. In this post, I want to share some of the invaluable lessons and memories that continue to guide us.
One of the greatest gifts my parents gave me was unwavering trust and independence. From a young age, they allowed me to chart my own path, never second-guessing my choices—even when they included youthful experiments like smoking, which I dabbled in for a few years. They believed I knew what was best for myself, fostering a sense of responsibility that I, in turn, extended to Shravan and Radha. I've never questioned their decisions, trusting them to navigate life with the same freedom. This approach built resilience and self-confidence in all of us, proving that true parenting isn't about control but empowerment.
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Another cornerstone of their example was the deep sense of familial duty they embodied. My grandparents lived with us from 1958 until 1995, (Grand Mother 2005)spending their entire retirement under our roof. Dad and Mom cared for them with grace and dedication, handling everything from daily needs to emotional support. This taught me that supporting our elders isn't an obligation but a privilege. When the time came, Lalitha and I welcomed Mom and Dad into our home in Bangalore during their final years. Lalitha was an integral part of this, mirroring the compassion my parents showed. It's a cycle of care that strengthens family bonds and reminds us of our interconnectedness.
Mom, in particular, was a master of relationships—a true peacemaker and hostess extraordinaire. I can't recall a single instance of friction among family, friends, or relatives under her watch. She had an uncanny ability to focus on the positive, always viewing situations through a lens of optimism while keeping long-term harmony in mind. Relationships, she showed me, triumph over fleeting conflicts. This philosophy has helped me maintain strong ties in my own life, ensuring that love and understanding prevail.
And oh, how we all adored Mom's cooking! Her kitchen was a haven of flavors, from savory meals that nourished our bodies to sweets that delighted our souls. (She lived in Delhi in her teens) Not just me, but Shravan and Radha were enamored with her dishes. From Karaikudi, she'd send homemade treats their way, satisfying their sweet tooths with love wrapped in every bite. Today, my sister has stepped into that role, continuing the tradition by preparing sweets that I brought along on my recent visit to Shravan and Radha. It's these small acts that keep her spirit alive in our daily lives.
Of course, no tribute would be complete without acknowledging Dad's complexities. He had a sharp temper, an acid tongue, and a penchant for sarcasm that could sting. Yet, Mom's gentle nature balanced him perfectly, covering his shortcomings with her warmth. Beneath it all, Dad was incredibly large-hearted, never stingy when it mattered most. His generosity shone brightest during Mom's battle with cancer in 1990, just weeks before my wedding. He poured every ounce of his purpose-driven resolve into her recovery, ensuring she pulled through. Remarkably, amid that crisis, he even completed his Ph.D. a few months prior—a testament to his determination and love.
I could go on endlessly about their virtues. Mom and Dad were adored by all relatives, their home a hub of joy and support. While I miss their physical presence deeply, their grace and legacy endure. At Amritkala, our family home, their blessings continue to flow, inspiring us to live with independence, compassion, and unbreakable bonds. On this anniversary, I raise a silent toast to Dr. T.M.B. and Vijaya—may their story remind us all that true love isn't just about the years, but the lives it touches.
Karthik
31/1/26 Saturday, Foster City, CA 1800 Hrs PST.
Today in 1999, I was bitten by internet bug at Yokohma, Japan. Rest is as they say is History.
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