Karthik's Thoughts (Come what may!!): A Wake-Up Call for Women's Health: Learning from Life’s Subtle Reminders

#543

Context.

It was 6 AM today, Lalitha and I were returning from the hospital after giving our blood samples. In that half-awake state, I asked her a question—one of those random, playful questions that come out of nowhere: “What atrocious behavior of mine would lead to you murdering me?” Without missing a beat, she replied, “Never,” even before I finished the question.

I chuckled at her quick response, but the moment lingered with me. I couldn’t shake off how lucky I am to have her by my side, always supportive, always steady. But this also stirred a deeper reflection that’s been sitting at the back of my mind for a while.

In the past few months, I’ve thought about the women in my family and friends who left us too early. Many were hale and healthy, and their departures were as sudden / expected but not so soon, as they were tragic. And what’s more striking is how often I’ve heard this story from others too. “My father was always the sick one,” friends tell me, “but it was my mother who left us first, in the blink of an eye.”

This got me pondering—how is it that these women, who seem to bear the brunt of the household’s emotional and physical labor, often depart so suddenly? It’s a tragedy, especially in our Indian system, where men are typically five years older than their wives when they marry. When these women leave, their husbands are often left completely lost, rudderless, unsure of how to cope without the anchor they’ve always known.

So, what can be done to avoid this? What can women do to take care of themselves and ensure they don't become silent sufferers in the prime of their lives?

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Women's Health: Staying Strong Amid Life's Unseen Demands

In today’s world, it's not uncommon to see both men and women working to meet financial needs. But while men’s roles at home have shifted somewhat, for many women, the responsibilities remain just as heavy as ever. Not only is she a professional in her career, but at home, she still plays the role of wife, mother, administrator, janitor, caretaker, and emotional support. Society may have advanced, but when it comes to housework and emotional labor, many things still fall squarely on her shoulders.

And it doesn’t stop there. Age catches up with women in ways that men often don’t fully appreciate—especially when it comes to menopause. Let’s face it: how many men really know what hot flashes, mood swings, or the mental exhaustion of menopause feel like? Many husbands, well-intentioned as they may be, may not fully grasp the physical pain, cramps, or the depression that hormonal changes can bring. (Oh yes, and let’s not forget: he still expects sex, (Twice a week at least!!) even when her energy is at rock bottom!)

It’s no wonder women can sometimes feel overwhelmed. There’s work, where office politics are ever-present, and the need to maintain one’s professional standing. There’s home, where responsibilities remain a constant drumbeat. And then, there’s her own body, going through changes that demand care and attention.

How Can She Keep Her Energy High?

It’s clear that women need practical tools to keep their well-being in check, especially in the face of these challenges. Here are some tips for maintaining those critical energy reserves—physical, emotional, spiritual, and mental—that are key to not just surviving but thriving.

1. Prioritize Self-Care (And Don’t Apologize for It)***

For many women, taking time for themselves can feel like selfishness. But it’s not. In fact, it’s essential. Whether it’s a short walk, time for meditation, or even just a quiet coffee in the morning—those moments recharge her physically and emotionally. A woman cannot pour from an empty cup, and self-care is how she refills it.

2. Build in Physical Exercise, However Small

With the endless to-do lists, finding time for exercise can seem impossible. However, even small bursts of physical activity make a difference. Try a 10-minute walk, a few stretches before bed, or even some light yoga. Not only will this help with physical health, but it also boosts mental clarity and reduces stress.

3. Embrace Mindfulness and Meditation

The mental load women carry can be heavy, and over time, it builds stress. Daily mindfulness practices—whether it’s deep breathing exercises or meditation—can help calm the mind and increase emotional resilience. Setting aside just five minutes a day can work wonders.

4. Acknowledge and Address Menopause

Menopause is a significant phase of life that brings with it a host of symptoms that are often brushed under the carpet. Women should not hesitate to speak with healthcare professionals about options for managing symptoms like hot flashes, insomnia, or mood swings. There are many treatments and lifestyle adjustments (diet changes, supplements, or hormone therapy) that can alleviate the physical and emotional discomfort.

5. Build a Support Network

Sometimes, women feel like they have to do it all. But having a support system—whether it’s a trusted friend, a therapist, or a support group—can make all the difference. Sharing frustrations and challenges lightens the load emotionally and helps build resilience. This can help overcome Depression and Suicidal tendency which is more for women.

6. Practice Emotional Boundaries

It’s easy for women to take on everyone else’s emotions at home, absorbing the stresses of their family members. Establishing emotional boundaries, though difficult, is critical. Women should feel comfortable saying “no” without guilt and prioritizing their mental health.

7. Nourish the Spiritual Self

Spiritual energy can come from many sources, whether it’s religion, nature, or simply moments of gratitude. Regular reflection and time to connect with something beyond the daily grind can be incredibly restorative. Even simple practices like journaling or spending time in nature can fuel the soul. Spritual connectedness in whatever form is key.

8. Communicate with Your Partner

Lastly, and perhaps most importantly, communication with the husband is key. Men need to be made aware of the pressures their wives face—at work, at home, and with their bodies. An honest conversation about emotional and physical needs (including intimacy) can help both partners navigate this stage of life more compassionately.

Lalitha and I spend 10 Min at 5am, to plan our day, and 20 min at 8pm with the walk with conversation that is frank and candour.

In a world that asks women to be everything to everyone, the most revolutionary thing she can do is take care of herself first. By maintaining her physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual energy, she can face the world’s demands with strength, clarity, and resilience.

It’s not selfish. It’s essential.

**** Practical tips for women on self-care:

Regular Health Check-ups – Prioritize regular medical exams, mammograms, bone density tests, and other screenings relevant to age and health history.
Balanced Diet – Focus on a balanced diet rich in fruits, vegetables, lean proteins, and healthy fats to support overall health and hormonal balance.
Stay Hydrated – Drink plenty of water throughout the day to stay energized and support bodily functions.
Prioritize Sleep – Aim for 7-8 hours of quality sleep to aid in mental clarity, mood regulation, and physical recovery.
Mindful Movement – Incorporate gentle physical activities like walking, stretching, or yoga into your daily routine.
Breathing Exercises – Practice deep breathing or mindfulness techniques to relieve stress and promote relaxation.
Limit Caffeine – Monitor caffeine intake to prevent disruption to sleep and mood.
Stay Socially Connected – Build and maintain meaningful relationships with friends, family, or support groups.
Delegate and Share Responsibilities – Don’t hesitate to delegate household or work tasks to reduce mental and physical strain.
Practice Gratitude – Take a moment each day to reflect on things you are grateful for to improve emotional well-being.
Take Mini Breaks – Incorporate short, frequent breaks throughout the day to recharge and avoid burnout.
Invest in a Hobby – Dedicate time to hobbies that bring joy and fulfillment.
Maintain Mental Health – Seek counseling or therapy when feeling overwhelmed or stressed; mental health is just as important as physical health. Asking for help is a sign of Strength, not weakness!
Hormonal Health Management – Consult a doctor for help managing menopause symptoms or other hormonal imbalances.
Limit Screen Time – Set boundaries on screen time, especially on social media, TV, (WhatsApp too women are addicted to it) to avoid mental fatigue.
Self-Compassion – Practice kindness toward yourself, avoiding harsh self-criticism or impossible expectations.
Boundaries at Work – Set clear boundaries between work and personal life to prevent overexertion.
Spiritual Care – Engage in spiritual practices or moments of introspection to maintain inner peace.
Create a Support System – Have a group of trusted individuals to lean on during challenging times.
Pamper Yourself – Occasionally indulge in activities that make you feel good, like a spa day or a quiet afternoon with a book.