Green-Eyed Colleagues and Thunder-Stealers: My Take on Workplace Drama.

 #633

Personal Update:- Family Annoucement in coming weeks! I missed to be in America under "45" now getting ready under "47". 

 ______________________________________________________________________________

Context:- Bartleby Column and HBR Blog today!

I’ve had a pretty smooth ride in my career—Health, Safety, and Environment (HSE) was my turf, a field just taking off back in the 80s and 90s, too unique for anyone to mess with my groove. My colleagues were rock-solid, my bosses were top-notch, and we were all about pushing each other up. But I’ve heard the tales—colleagues turning green with envy over your success, or thunder-stealers, sometimes even the boss, swiping your credit like it’s free lunch. Never felt it myself, but I know it’s out there. So, let’s dive into this workplace drama—why it happens, how to spot it, and how to glide through it like water off a lotus leaf. Plus, I’ll throw in some wisdom on toxic cultures to watch out for!

The Jealousy Game: Why Are They So Envious?

So why do colleagues get all worked up and jealous? It’s not just random bad vibes—it’s personal for them. Maybe you landed that promotion they were eyeing, or your idea got the boss’s “Superb, macha!” while theirs got a “Let’s see.” I saw it once with R, a junior I knew. He aced an audit, got a thumbs-up and a step up. His teammate S? Couldn’t stomach it. Why? S thought it was his turn, even though he hadn’t slogged as much. It’s insecurity, my friend—your win feels like their loss. In India, we’re wired to compare—board exam marks, entrance ranks, who got the swanky job. When you shine, it’s like waving their “what ifs” in their face.

Then there’s the ego factor. Some folks think success is a one-man show—if you’re up, they’re down. I never faced this in HSE—my work was so technical, nobody could fake it. But in regular setups? It’s a forest out there. They’re jealous because they’re scared—of lagging behind, of not matching up, or just because they can’t stand someone else stealing the spotlight.

Power Dynamics: The Office Chessboard

Now, let’s talk the big picture—organisation power dynamics. Jealousy doesn’t just sprout up; it’s cooked in the company’s pressure pot. If the higher-ups play favourites—pushing their pet people over the real doers—it’s a spark for resentment. I’ve been lucky; my bosses came from elite setups—MITs, Imperial College, London and global firms—with a broad mindset that didn’t entertain cheap tricks. But in places where power’s a battleground, you’ll see it. The boss who grabs credit sets the tone—suddenly, everyone’s racing to look good, stepping on toes. Or those ladder-like structures—only one gets the top spot, so colleagues turn into competitors. S sulked because his senior didn’t give him a fair chance; the system made them rivals. When the culture screams “me” over “us,” jealousy’s the natural side dish.

Spotting Your True Supporters and Building Bonds

So, who’s really in your corner? Your true well-wishers are easy to spot—they’re the ones cheering when you win, not just when they do. In my career, I had mentors who’d pull me aside and say, “Karthik, you’re smashing it, Doing great, keep going!” or when I did not so well, "Go jump in to waste water plant" No hidden motives, just pure support. Look for people who ask about your work because they’re interested, not to copy-paste it. They’ll back you up when the thunder-stealers strike.

Building that bond? Keep it simple—be yourself. Share a coffee, crack a joke, ask about their weekend. I’d chat with my team about their ideas, not just mine—it kept us tight. Yes, sometimes, it may take your bed time well past midnight, having sat in the bar for good 3 hrs post dinner. Don’t show off your wins; let them have their moment too. If S's grumpy, I’d say, “Hey, your last report was solid, what’s your take on this?” Small steps, big trust.

Dodging Drama Like Water Off a Lotus Leaf

Here’s the secret—how do you sidestep these envious types without stepping on toes? Be like water off a lotus leaf—there, but not stuck. Don’t take their digs to heart; let it roll off. I’d smile at snide remarks and carry on—why waste my energy? Keep chats light—work stuff, not personal. (As Mark Horstman of Manager Tools, says - "How you feel is your Fault".) If they’re fishing for a clash, don’t bite. “Oh, crazy day, let’s talk later!” works like magic. Focus on your game—when you’re too busy winning, their nonsense feels like static. My HSE days taught me this: head down, results up, and the drama fades.

Thunder-Stealers: When Your Credit Gets Snatched

Now, the credit-grabbers—colleagues or bosses who parade your work as theirs. I’ve been spared this, thanks to teams where credit was shared and everyone felt good. But take a female colleague known to me—she slogged on a compliance plan, only for her boss to soak up the praise. Or an Environmental Engineer, whose waste management idea got pinched by a teammate in a meeting. Why? Ego, opportunism, or just a rotten culture where stealing thunder’s routine.

Call it out gently—“Glad you liked my slides, sir, took me weeks!”—and keep proof. I saved emails and drafts, always notes, not out of doubt, but habit. If it’s constant, especially from the boss, (Yes I did have a below average boss for a few months, law of averages catches up with everyone, I am no exception) it’s a culture signal. Time to think: Is this place worth my sweat?

Cut-Throat Culture: Red Flags to Watch

Speaking of culture, how do you know you’re in a dog-eat-dog setup? Signs are all over, my friend. One: backstabbing’s normal—colleagues trash each other to climb up. Two: credit’s a fight—nobody says “team work,” it’s all “I did it.” Three: fear drives everything—people work to save their skin, not to grow. Four: cliques and bootlicking—boss’s favourites get the perks, rest get crumbs. I’ve seen friends in such places—stressed, drained, always on guard. My workplaces? Open, fair, global-minded. Also look for questioning attitude, healthy arguements, seeking help, well laid out plans, responsibilities aligned across, as well as things happen on time with clockwork precision and committment /deadlines are most sacrosant as well as clear behaviours expected tied to results. If these aspects are missing, not a great workplace. Total contrast.

My Lucky Run and Final Thoughts

I’ve been fortunate—no envy, no credit-stealing, just good vibes. Maybe it was the elite bosses, their exposure to foreign cultures rubbing off, or HSE being too niche to nick. Yes, I’ve seen lucky colleagues in other functions soar, and brilliant ones miss out—life’s a dice game. So, my advice? Rise above the envy—let them stew while you shine. Spot your crew, dodge the drama, and if the culture’s a mess, plan your move. You deserve a workplace that lifts you, not one that pulls you down.

Comments? Karthik.

10/3/25 930am.

Healthy Food Habits: Eat Smart, Live Better

 #632

Context: I accompanied Lalitha last evening to the Cold Oil press Shop for our Monthly purchase. Hence the blog. 

Our monthly purchase of Cold Press Oil. (Past 18 months or so!). We stopped buying packed oil. Lalitha carries container to get filled. (Like getting Milk old days!) 

I’ve been digging into what we eat lately, and it’s been a real eye-opener. After reading stuff like Dr. Robert Lustig’s work (Metabolical) and The Case Against Sugar, I’m convinced we need to rethink our food game. Ultra-processed junk, sugar that’s worse than cocaine, and artificial sweeteners that mess us up—time to talk about it! I’ve got some solid case studies to back this up, so let’s jump in, okay?

1. Ultra-Processed Foods: The Sneaky Trouble-Makers

You know those packets of chips, instant noodles, and ready-to-eat meals we grab when we’re in a rush? Ultra-processed stuff—full of chemicals, fake tastes, and zero goodness. They’re tasty, sure, but they’re bad news for our health—think weight gain, diabetes, and heart problems.

Case Study: The Hall Experiment (2019)
Dr. Kevin Hall in the US did a cool test: 20 people ate ultra-processed food (like our masala chips and frozen cutlets) or proper food (say, sambar and rice) for two weeks, then swapped. Same calories, but the processed group put on half a kilo—while the real-food group lost it! Why? Their hunger went haywire, and they ate 500 extra calories without even noticing. Gut health also took a hit. So, next time you’re eyeing that packet stuff, maybe go for home-cooked instead, no?

2. Sugar: Worse Than Cocaine for Addiction

Sugar isn’t just about rasam with extra jaggery or a post-meal sweet—it’s a proper addiction trap. Lustig says it’s a drug, and The Case Against Sugar calls it a slow killer we’ve all fallen for. Worse than cocaine? Yep, because it’s everywhere—soft drinks, desserts, even “healthy” snacks.

Case Study: Lenoir’s Rats (2007)
Some French researchers put rats to the test: sugar vs. cocaine. Guess what? The rats picked sugar water over cocaine every single time—even after getting hooked on the hard stuff. Why? Sugar blasts your brain’s happy spot harder, making you crave it more. Same with us—kids guzzling cola, us sipping sweet coffee—it’s setting us up for diabetes, fatty liver, and energy dips. Time to cut down, folks!

3. Artificial Sweeteners: Fake Sweetness, Real Damage

Okay, so you ditch sugar and grab a diet drink—smart move, right? Not really. Artificial sweeteners like the ones in “sugar-free” stuff promise no calories but mess with your body big time. Brain gets confused, gut goes off-track, and metabolism? Total chaos.

Case Study: Suez et al. (2014)
Scientists in Israel tested artificial sweeteners on mice and people. Mice eating this stuff got glucose issues—early diabetes signs—because their gut bacteria went nuts. Then, seven humans drank diet drinks for a week—same thing: blood sugar shot up, gut got messed. Compare that to plain water drinkers—no trouble at all. Lustig says it’s a trap: you skip sugar but still get whacked. Better stick to filter coffee with a little sugar than fake stuff, right?

4. Industrial Refined Vegetable Oils: The Hidden Gut-Buster

And then there’s the oil we cook with—those cheap refined vegetable oils like sunflower or soybean oil in every kitchen. They sound okay, but they’re trouble. Processed with heat and chemicals, they’re loaded with unhealthy fats—omega-6s—that throw your body out of whack. They mess up your gut by causing inflammation, killing off good bacteria, and letting bad stuff leak into your system. Over time? Heart disease, obesity, even joint pain. Compare that to coconut oil or ghee—our old-school options—and it’s no contest. Lustig would say it’s another industrial trick we’ve been sold, and it’s wrecking us quietly.

Wrapping Up: Keep It Real, Feel Good

So, here’s my take, Karthik-style: healthy eating isn’t some big headache—it’s simple. Ultra-processed junk piles on kilos and ruins your gut (thanks, Hall). Sugar’s an addiction bomb worse than cocaine (rats proved it). Artificial sweeteners? Fake fix, real mess (Suez showed us). And those refined oils? Silent health killers. Stick to real food—rice, dal, veggies, fish /egg, cooked in ghee or coconut oil—and skip the nonsense. Lustig and The Case Against Sugar woke me up, and I’m here to pass it on. Let’s eat smart, live better, okay?

End Note: I have given up sugar for the past 30 years, sweets occasionally but nil for the past 90 days and plan to give up forever. So it’s working for me, and I’m able to see the difference. Also no junk snacks, and plenty of water. Veggies are now maximum, more than rice / Brown Rice.

Karthik

9th March 2025

12Noon. 

Where Has the Human Touch Gone in 2025?

 #631

Personal Update:- 

3 Women who I "Rever, Dear and Fear"...(International Women's day!) I leave the guesswork on who's who to you! hahah! 8th March 2020.

+++++++

Yesterday, I received some messages and reflected on my own experiences. They all point to one thing: something feels missing in how we connect with each other today. Whether it’s at work, in personal life, or even with strangers, the warmth, gratitude, and care we once saw seem to be fading. Let me share these stories and my thoughts with you.

Story 1: The Lonely Recruiter and Forgotten Thanks

A recruiter from a big city in India messaged, he’s been helping people get jobs for 35 years. In the past, when candidates got selected, they’d send him thank-you cards, visit his office, or bring sweets to share the joy. But for the last 10 years, things have changed. Now, no one tells him if they got the job. Companies don’t even share feedback. He’s also a talented photographer who sends beautiful pictures to friends, but people—especially those aged 20-40—don’t even say thanks. I had a similar experience too. I emailed 130 people in my network, suggesting a 30-minute call every few months to stay connected. Only 9 replied, and just 7 made real plans. One person met me for lunch, which was nice, but I wonder—why don’t more people care to keep in touch?

Story 2: A Manager’s Death, Forgotten in Hours

An Indian employee shared a sad story. His manager passed away 20 hours ago. You’d expect people—colleagues, peers, or the team—to feel something, to pause and remember him. But just 2 hours later, it was business as usual. No one seemed affected. The employee felt hurt and asked, “Is this all life is in 2025? Where are the feelings?” The family was left to grieve alone, with only a small effort from the company. It’s as if the manager never existed. How can people move on so fast?

Story 3: A Young Girl’s Struggle in a New City

My manager (91-96) messaged me about his grand-niece, a 20-year-old from North India. She got an internship at an IT company in Madras and moved there Monday morning, with big hopes. I shared some information to him on Paying Guest facilities, contacts to reach out in Madras, etc to work her way. But within 72 hours, Thursday night, she flew back home. Why? The company environment, hygiene, and place she stayed felt cold and unwelcoming. She could feel the hostility in everything. No one helped her settle in—no buddy, no care. She wasted time, money, and energy, and went back disappointed. How can a young girl in a new city be left so alone?

---

The Common Theme: Losing the Human Touch

What ties these stories together? It’s the loss of the “human touch”—the small acts of kindness, gratitude, and care that make us feel connected. The recruiter misses appreciation. The employee sees no emotion for a manager’s death. The young girl finds no warmth in a new place. Even my own effort to connect with friends showed how little people respond. In 2025, with so much technology, why are we losing what makes us human?

---

My Thoughts: Why Is This Happening?

As a 60-year-old with 40 years of work experience, I can tell you things weren’t like this when I left the corporate world 13 years ago. Back in 1999, interactions had meaning. People cared, said thanks, and supported each other—at least that’s how I saw it, even though I wasn’t in Indian organizations for the last 30 years. Something has changed, and it’s drastic. Here’s what I think caused it:

1. Speed and Pressure: Work today is faster. Deadlines are tighter, targets are bigger. People don’t have time to stop and chat or help someone new.
2. Technology Overload: In 1999, we had phones, but not smartphones or WhatsApp. We talked face-to-face or wrote letters. Now, everything is quick texts—easy to send, easy to ignore.
3. Money Over People: Companies chase profits more than ever. Employees are just numbers, not humans with feelings. Care isn’t “productive,” so it’s gone.
4. Younger Mindset: The 20-40 age group grew up with tech and competition. They’re focused on “me” and “now,” not “us” or “later.”
5. No Leadership Example: Back then, managers took time to know you. Today, they’re too busy or don’t see it as their job to build bonds.

In India, we’re known for our big hearts and strong bonds. But these stories make me wonder—are we losing that too?

---

Debate: Were We Naïve Then, or Are We Impractical Now?

This change bothers me, and I wonder—what do corporates and employees say to justify it? They might argue:

• “It’s Efficiency”: Companies could say, “We can’t waste time on feelings. Work must go on, even if someone dies or leaves.” Employees might add, “I’m too busy to thank everyone—it’s not personal.”
• “Times Have Changed”: They’d say, “In 1999, life was slower. Now, we compete globally. We can’t afford to be soft.”
• “It’s Not My Job”: A manager might claim, “I’m not paid to babysit interns or mourn with teams. HR should handle that.”

But were we naïve back then to care? Were thank-you cards and team lunches silly? I don’t think so. They built trust and made work human. Today’s “practical” world—where a manager’s death is forgotten in hours or a young girl is left to sink—feels cold and wrong. Maybe we weren’t impractical then; maybe we’re just heartless now. Were we fools to value people over profits? Or are we fools today to think this robotic life is progress? I’d love to hear your thoughts.

---

What Can We Do?

Should we just shrug and move on? No, I don’t think so. Small steps can bring back the human touch. Here’s what we can try:

1. Say Thanks: If someone helps you—a recruiter, a friend, anyone—send a quick “thank you.” It takes 10 seconds but means a lot.
2. Check on People: Call a friend, colleague, or family member once in a while. Ask how they are. Don’t wait for them to reach out.
3. Be Kind at Work: If you’re a manager, support your team. If you’re a colleague, show you care—especially when someone is new or struggling.
4. Pause for Feelings: If someone passes away or something big happens, take a moment to feel it. Don’t rush back to “normal.”
5. Teach the Young: Companies and families should show kids and new employees how to be warm and grateful. A buddy system for interns is a great start!

---

Final Words

Life isn’t just about jobs, money, or getting ahead. It’s about people—the ones who help us, work with us, or just pass through our lives. In 2025, let’s not let the human touch slip away. We can’t change everyone, but we can start with ourselves. A smile, a thank-you, a helping hand—small things can make India feel warm again. Were we better off caring in 1999, or is this cold world the future? What do you think—can we bring back the care we’re losing?

Karthik

8th March 2025

9am.

The Vanishing Breed: Leadership in the Age of Mediocrity.

 #630

A friend of mine sent the image. Made me think.

There was a time when leadership meant something—when those at the helm were more than just managers checking boxes, more than just figureheads playing it safe. They inspired, they motivated, they led with conviction and courage. They built trust and empowered people, pushing them to be better, not just to comply. That era, at least from what I have seen, is gone. Leadership today? A shadow of its former self, diluted, performative, and, in most cases, utterly uninspiring.

I look back at my career, spanning decades, where I had the privilege of working under truly exceptional leaders. Out of the twenty or more managers I served, only a couple fell short. The rest? They led with a kind of radical candor that is extinct today. They trusted their teams, empowered them, and were brutally blunt when needed—but always in a way that made you want to do better. Their delegation was so complete that it often left me double-checking my own work, not out of fear, but out of sheer respect for the trust they placed in me. Their belief in themselves and their people was absolute.

Today, that is a fantasy. Leadership has been reduced to a game of optics, risk aversion, and mindless compliance. It is more about following trends, checking diversity quotas, and maintaining a politically correct image than it is about actually driving vision and excellence. The result? A workforce that is disillusioned, disengaged, and on the verge of collapse—both physically and mentally. No wonder studies show that 77% of employees experience burnout. When leadership is weak, the entire system crumbles.

And this isn’t just a corporate phenomenon. Look at the political landscape. Where are the inspiring leaders? Where are the figures who command respect, who stand firm on their beliefs, who act with integrity? At best, you’ll find a handful who barely scrape past mediocrity. Even Donald Trump, for all his strengths, might score just 35% on the leadership scale—which is still significantly higher than the rest, who are mere ciphers, placeholders in suits.

What happened? How did we get here?

The Decline of Leadership: A Few Reasons

1. Fear-Driven Leadership – Today’s leaders are paralysed by the fear of making mistakes. Whether it’s the threat of social media backlash, lawsuits, or political correctness, they avoid tough decisions and take the safest, least impactful route.

2. Performance Metrics Over People – Leadership has become a numbers game. Instead of focusing on growth, development, and empowerment, it’s all about KPIs, compliance checklists, and maintaining a politically convenient image.

3. Short-Term Mindset – The obsession with quarterly results has destroyed long-term thinking. Leaders are incentivized to deliver quick wins rather than build lasting legacies.

4. Lack of Mentorship and Strong Role Models – Great leaders of the past were shaped by other great leaders. Today, that cycle is broken. Leadership is now more about networking and ‘managing up’ than it is about actually inspiring and building competent teams.

5. Mediocrity in Hiring and Promotions – With diversity and caste factors playing a role in leadership selection, there is less emphasis on competence and more on optics. The best people often don’t make it to the top.

Kaliyug: The Age of Decline

It’s no wonder that we are seeing the real-life manifestation of Kaliyug—the age where good deeds, thoughts, and leadership traits are on the path to extinction. When mediocrity is not only tolerated but actively rewarded, the decline is inevitable. What makes it even more tragic is that future generations will suffer the most. They will inherit a world where leadership is a façade, where genuine empowerment is replaced with tokenism, and where inspiration is a relic of the past.

What’s Next?

At this stage in my life, I have bailed out. Not because I have lost hope, but because I refuse to engage with a system that no longer values excellence. I feel sorry for the generations that will struggle in this climate, trapped in workplaces and societies led by uninspiring, weak-willed figures.

But perhaps, like all cycles, this too will change. Maybe, after enough suffering, after enough failures, the world will once again recognise the value of real leadership. Until then, those of us who remember what it was like when leaders truly led can only watch from the sidelines, hoping that someday, excellence will make a return.

Until then, mediocrity reigns. And leadership, as we once knew it, is no more.

Karthik

7th March 2025

830am. 

Lessons for Indian Leaders from Trump-Vance's Handling of Zelensky.

 #629

The recent meeting between Donald Trump, JD Vance, and Ukraine’s President Volodymyr Zelensky at the White House, last Friday, has many valuable lessons for Indian managers, business and other leaders. The way Trump and Vance handled the conversation exposed Zelensky’s miscalculations, which ultimately weakened his position. Indian corporate leaders can take away key insights from this episode to navigate their own business and professional environments more effectively. Here are the lessons:

1. Dress for Success – You Can Always Dress Down Later

One of the most striking mistakes Zelensky made was showing up in his usual military-style outfit despite being advised to wear a suit. In professional settings, appearances matter. First impressions can set the tone of a meeting. A well-dressed leader commands respect. You can always remove a tie or jacket if needed, but underdressing in a formal setting shows a lack of awareness. Indian professionals should remember – when in Rome, be a Roman. Respect the setting, and dress accordingly. 

2. Know When to Argue, Know When to Accept

Zelensky pushed his points multiple times despite clear indications that Trump and Vance were not going to budge. You can present your case and resist once or twice, but if the decision-maker does not agree, you need to move on. Arguing endlessly only weakens your position. Indian professionals must recognize that while logic and reasoning are important, once a leader has made a decision, it is best to align with it rather than fight a losing battle.

3. Don’t Get Misled by Your Inner Circle

Zelensky was influenced by Democrat congressmen, failing to recognize the shift in U.S. leadership. He assumed that the same approach that worked with Biden would work with Trump. Indian managers often make the same mistake by relying too much on their advisors without assessing changes in leadership. A new leader means new priorities, and adapting to them is key to survival and success.

4. Past Success Does Not Guarantee Future Success

Zelensky believed he could use the same tactics he employed with Biden – playing victim, making demands, and expecting unquestioned support. However, Trump and JD Vance operate differently. In business, what worked in the past may not work today. Indian companies need to stay agile and adapt their strategies as per the new leadership, market changes, and global shifts.

5. Respect Hierarchy and Protocol

One of the biggest blunders Zelensky made was addressing JD Vance as 'JD' instead of ‘Mr. Vice President.’ In high-level negotiations and official meetings, informality can be a costly mistake. In India, too, managers must maintain professionalism in formal discussions. Familiarity should not override the decorum of the situation.

6. Stick to the Agenda – Don’t Flip-flop

Before leaving Kyiv, Zelensky had agreed to discuss mineral extraction with the U.S. leadership. However, after speaking to U.S. Senators, he changed his stance. This move backfired. It showed inconsistency and a lack of commitment. Indian business leaders should learn that once an agenda is agreed upon, last-minute changes weaken trust and credibility.

7. Rigid Thinking Leads to Failure

Zelensky’s rigid stance of refusing to engage in talks with Putin is taking Ukraine nowhere. In business and leadership, refusing to negotiate or compromise can be disastrous. Trump aims for global peace, and he expects Ukraine to seek a resolution instead of dragging the conflict indefinitely. Indian managers must recognize that flexibility and strategic thinking are necessary for long-term success.

8. Think Strategically – Begin with the End in Mind

Zelensky failed to apply fundamental leadership principles: Think Win-Win, Seek First to Understand, Then to Be Understood. Instead of understanding Trump's stance and adjusting his approach, he stubbornly stuck to his old ways. In India, leaders must embrace a strategic mindset. Understanding the bigger picture, assessing the situation realistically, and focusing on sustainable outcomes are essential.

Final Thoughts

Zelensky’s missteps in this meeting offer important insights for Indian professionals and leaders. Whether in politics or business, success depends on adaptability, respect for hierarchy, strategic thinking, and professional conduct. Indian managers and business leaders should learn from these lessons and apply them in their professional journeys to navigate leadership changes, negotiations, and corporate diplomacy with skill and tact.

End Note

I am not a Vladimir Putin fan. In the current situation, Zelensky has been weakened with the progress of the Russian military. ( I am not going in to why the war / Special Military operations, started in the first place) He is also now governing under Martial Law, (His term in office is over about 9 months back) effectively making him another dictator. While it is impossible to conduct elections during wartime, Zelensky appears to have no intent to bring the war to an end. The man who was once thought to be the next Churchill has fallen from grace significantly over the last 30 months. He needs to work on his emotional intelligence, pragmatism, and the ability to win wars by knowing when to let go. The more Zelensky resists and remains stubborn, the more the world will see him in a negative light, regardless of how wrong Putin may be. With Trump and Vance now acting as the bigger power brokers—and America, until Biden, being the major sponsor of the war—Russia, Europe, and Ukraine need to align with the American way of thinking and find a middle-ground agreement to bring peace.

Karthik

6th March 2025

930am. 

The Mystery of Unconditional Love: Why Women Love Without Asking Why (Lalitha)

 #628

3rd March 2025, at Shravan Schoolmate's Wedding reception, Hotel Lalith Ashok, BLR. 

++++++
Love has been explored through poetry, philosophy, and psychology for centuries, yet one recurring theme stands out—women often express love unconditionally, without a clear reason. The classic conversation goes like this:

Man: What do you like about me?

Woman: I don’t know, I just love you.

Even years later, if asked again, the answer remains the same. It’s as if a woman’s love exists beyond logic, beyond tangible attributes, and beyond conscious reasoning. This begs the question—why do women love men unconditionally while men often love with intent?

Is Women’s Love Truly Unconditional?

When a woman says she doesn’t know why she loves a man, it is not an evasion but an emotional truth. Unlike men, who tend to list reasons for their affection (a good wife, a nurturing mother, a strong partner, a trusted friend, or even a passionate companion), women often love without seeking a return on investment. But why?

1. Evolutionary Psychology: The Caregiver Instinct

From an evolutionary standpoint, women have been wired to nurture and sustain relationships. Historically, their role as caregivers ensured emotional security for their partners and offspring. This instinct extends to their relationships with men—creating an environment where love is freely given, with the hope of stability in return.

While men traditionally focused on protection and provision, women focused on emotional depth and connection. Over time, this dynamic reinforced the idea that a woman’s love does not demand a reason; it simply is.

2. Emotional vs. Transactional Love

Men often approach love with a sense of purpose. They seek compatibility in areas that fulfill their needs—a good partner, an advisor, a supporter, or a passionate lover. Women, on the other hand, are more likely to experience love as an intrinsic emotion rather than a checklist of qualities.

This difference explains why many women remain devoted even when their partners undergo changes—be it in appearance, ambition, or personality. While men may recalibrate their affections based on shifting circumstances, women tend to love despite them.

3. The Power of Emotional Investment

For many women, love is an investment of self. Once they are emotionally committed, they find it hard to detach—even when their partner’s actions no longer align with their expectations. This is why women often overlook signs of emotional neglect, misinterpreting a man’s growing distance as temporary or circumstantial.

Men, however, are more likely to evaluate relationships based on fulfillment. When a woman no longer provides the qualities that attracted him—whether it’s companionship, admiration, or emotional support—his love may dwindle. Women, by contrast, persist even when the dynamic changes.

4. Cultural and Social Conditioning

In societies like India, women are often raised with the idea that unwavering devotion is a virtue. The concept of pativrata—a woman devoted to her husband regardless of his shortcomings—has been ingrained for generations. Even in modern relationships, remnants of this mindset persist, where women feel that loving without conditions is not just an emotional choice but an expectation.

This explains why many women stay in relationships where love is not reciprocated in action. Even when a man’s behavior changes, they continue to love, assuming that he is merely distracted or that their patience will restore the bond.

5. The Blind Spot: Ignoring Signs of Fading Love

One of the most poignant aspects of unconditional love is a woman’s ability to not see when a man has emotionally checked out. Unlike men, who often recognize when their needs are no longer being met, women are more likely to rationalize a partner’s emotional withdrawal.

This is not naivety but rather a deep-seated emotional investment that makes it difficult to acknowledge the painful truth—that love is not always reciprocated in the same way.

Does This Serve Women Well?

While unconditional love sounds noble, it often comes at a cost. Women who love without expectations may:

• Tolerate emotional neglect or even mistreatment.

• Fail to recognize when a relationship has run its course.

• Continue investing in a partner who no longer values the connection.

In the Indian context, this is seen in women who stay in unfulfilling marriages or relationships long after the emotional core has eroded. Love, while unconditional, should not come at the expense of self-worth.

The Changing Dynamic: Is This Pattern Shifting?

With modern relationships evolving, women are beginning to approach love with greater self-awareness. Unlike past generations, where devotion was paramount, today’s women are recognizing the need for reciprocity.

As women gain financial independence, emotional resilience, and broader life choices, the notion of loving without expectation is gradually giving way to a more balanced dynamic—one where both partners contribute equally to the relationship’s emotional well-being.

A Personal Reflection: My Own Experience

This understanding of unconditional love became deeply personal to me as I am now  reading a game changing book, Don't Believe Everything You Think by Joseph Nguyen. He touches up on the topic of Unconditional love he receive(s) from girl friend over past 7 years. I realized that I have lived with this phenomenon for 35 years, Lalitha, has never been able to articulate why she loves me—her love simply is.

For over three decades of marriage (and seven months of courtship before that), whenever I have asked her why she loves me, her answer has been unwavering: "I don’t know, I just love you."

On the other hand, I can easily list at least ten reasons why I love her—her care, the warmth she brings as a mother to my kids, her role as a daughter-in-law, our companionship, and yes, even the simple pleasures of sharing food and intimacy. These are tangible aspects, and when any of them is missing, it naturally leads to a sense of dissatisfaction. And yet, her love for me has remained unshaken, despite our disagreements and divergent views on certain issues.

Experiencing this firsthand made me realize that this isn’t just a theory—it’s a deeply ingrained truth about how men and women love differently. While I have always loved with intent, she has always loved with heart. And perhaps, that is the greatest strength of unconditional love—it withstands reason, logic, and even the rough patches of life. Hahhahah! Will this stop the 40 Year Marriage Itch??? Let us see, still 5 years to go..

Final Thoughts: The Beauty and Challenge of Unconditional Love

The idea that women love unconditionally while men love with intent is both profound and complex. It highlights a fundamental difference in emotional wiring but also underscores an imbalance in how love is given and received.

Perhaps the ideal relationship is one where men learn to love with less intent and more heart, while women learn to balance their deep love with self-respect and awareness.

Love, after all, should not just be unconditional—it should be mutual.

Karthik

4th March 2025.

+++++

Have you listend to JK Sax Saxophone ?... Boy! 700 videos, each a treasure to orginal song!! (The Sax mastero is from Vilnius, Lithuania, give a listen!). Most of the days 10am to 3pm, I play this as background music, as I work. (Happening now!!). 

Living Longer in India: Are We Happier or Just Older? My story too!

 #627

Introduction: A Milestone That Raises Questions

This week, The Economist ran a thought-provoking piece about India’s journey over the past 75 years since independence. One number stood out: our life expectancy has jumped from a mere 42 years in 1947 to 71 years today—just a year shy of the global average of 72. It’s a proud moment, isn’t it? Better healthcare, improved nutrition, and economic growth have added nearly three decades to our lives. But here’s the catch—are we truly happier or more satisfied with these extra years? Or are we just living longer with more worries?

The truth is, as Indians live longer, the way we live is changing fast. The joint family system that once held us together is fading. Cities are growing, nuclear families are the norm, and fewer babies are being born. Soon, India will have more people over 60 than ever before—some say by 2050, one in five of us will be elderly. This shift is a double-edged sword. While the young sweat to keep the economy running, the old face loneliness, financial insecurity, and a rising cost of living. So, what’s the point of living longer if these uncertainties loom large? Let’s dig deeper into this, look at some numbers, and figure out what India—and all of us—can do about it.

---

The Numbers Tell a Story

Let’s start with the facts. In 1947, when India became free, the average Indian lived to 42—barely enough time to see grandkids. Today, at 71, we’re close to the global average of 72 (World Health Organization, 2021). Compare this to other countries:

• Japan: 84 years—world leader, but with an aging crisis.
• USA: 77 years—wealthy, but healthcare costs are sky-high.
• China: 77 years—another big nation aging fast.
• Brazil: 76 years—a growing economy like ours, facing similar shifts.

Back home, the elderly population (60+) is exploding. In 2021, we had 138 million seniors, up from 104 million in 2011 (Government of India, 2021). By 2050, the UN predicts this will hit 347 million—20% of our population. That’s more people than the entire USA today! Meanwhile, our fertility rate has dropped from 6 kids per woman in the 1950s to just 2 now—below the replacement level of 2.1 (National Family Health Survey, 2019-21). Fewer kids mean fewer hands to care for the old.

---

The Social Fabric: Unraveling Threads

Once, joint families were our strength. Grandparents lived with kids and grandkids under one roof—sharing stories, meals, and burdens. Today, urbanization has changed that. Cities like Mumbai, Delhi, and Bengaluru pull young people away for jobs, leaving parents behind in villages or small towns. Nuclear families—mum, dad, and maybe one or two kids—are now common. A 2023 UNFPA India Ageing Report says over 40% of elderly Indians are in the poorest wealth bracket, and one in five has no income. Add inflation—rising costs of food, rent, and medicine—and it’s a tough life.

Then there’s loneliness. Twenty years ago, joint families meant no one ate alone. Now, mental health issues are creeping in. A survey by HelpAge India found 30-50% of elderly folks show signs of depression, especially widows living solo. The old ways of community living are fading, and with them, the emotional safety net.

---

The Economic Burden: Young vs. Old

Here’s another worry: who pays the bills? With more elderly and fewer young people, the “dependency ratio” (elderly per 100 working-age people) is climbing. It was 14.2% in 2011, hit 15.7% in 2021, and could reach 20.1% by 2031 (Government of India, 2021). The young are stretched thin—working hard, saving little, and supporting ageing parents. Meanwhile, less than 11% of elderly Indians have pensions (PRB, 2023). Inflation makes it worse—think of how dal and petrol prices keep shooting up. For the old, it’s a struggle to afford even basic healthcare.

---

Are We Happier? The Big Question

Living to 71 is a win, but happiness isn’t guaranteed. The extra years come with uncertainties: Will I have enough money? Will my kids visit? Will I be healthy? A longer life feels empty if it’s spent worrying or alone. The Economist calls these “golden years,” but for many Indians, they’re turning grey with stress.

---

Solutions: What Can We Do?

India’s 1.5 billion people make this a giant challenge—bigger than Japan’s 125 million or the USA’s 330 million. But other countries offer ideas we can adapt. Here’s what the Government of India, states, and NGOs can do, plus some lessons from abroad:

1. Strengthen Pensions and Savings
   • What India Can Do: Only a few states like Odisha and Rajasthan have near-universal pensions. The National Social Assistance Programme (NSAP) needs a revamp—higher amounts, wider reach. Start schemes where young people save early for old age, like Japan’s mandatory pension system.
   • Global Lesson: Japan’s elderly get solid pensions, letting them live with dignity. Nordic countries like Sweden mix public and private savings—everyone chips in from youth.
2. Affordable Healthcare for All
   • What India Can Do: Build more geriatric (old-age) clinics, especially in villages. Subsidize medicines and expand Ayushman Bharat to cover chronic diseases like diabetes, which 75% of elderly face (LASI Report, 2023).
   • Global Lesson: Germany’s public healthcare covers long-term care for seniors—India could partner with NGOs for similar outreach.
3. Fight Loneliness with Community
   • What India Can Do: Create “intergenerational hubs”—spaces where seniors and youth meet. Think community centres with storytelling, skill-sharing, or childcare by grandparents. Revive joint family vibes in a modern way.
   • Global Lesson: Singapore’s “intergenerational housing” puts young and old in shared spaces—fostering bonds. South Korea uses tech to connect seniors with families via apps.
4. Jobs for the Elderly
   • What India Can Do: 40% of seniors want to work “as long as possible” (HelpAge India). Offer part-time jobs or skill training—think tutoring, handicrafts, or gardening.
   • Global Lesson: The USA’s “Silver Expertise” programs hire retirees for mentorship—India’s startups could tap this wisdom.
5. Tackle Inflation and Costs
   • What India Can Do: Control prices of essentials—food, fuel, meds. Subsidize housing for the elderly, like Tamil Nadu’s old-age homes.
   • Global Lesson: Brazil caps utility bills for low-income seniors—India could try this for basics.
6. Mental Health Support
   • What India Can Do: Train counselors for elderly depression. NGOs can run helplines or “chai-and-chat” groups in every town.
   • Global Lesson: The UK’s “Befriending Networks” pair volunteers with lonely seniors—simple but effective.

---

Learning from Others, Scaling for India

Japan, with 28% of its population over 65, invests in robots and tech for eldercare—India could explore affordable tech like telemedicine. Germany’s social insurance covers all ages—our EPF and NPS could expand similarly. The USA’s community programs keep seniors active—we could blend this with our culture of family ties. Yes, our 1.5 billion scale is unique, but small pilots in states like Kerala (already ageing fast) can show the way.

---

The Way Forward: A Call to Action

Living longer is a gift, but it’s up to us to make it golden. The Government of India must act—boost pensions, build healthcare, and fight loneliness. States like Bihar (still young) and Kerala (already old) need tailored plans. NGOs, with their grassroots reach, can bridge gaps—think HelpAge India’s work during COVID. And we, as families and neighbors, must step up—visit our elders, listen to them, include them.

So, are we happier living longer? Not yet, maybe. But with smart moves, we can be. Let’s not just add years to life—let’s add life to those years. What do you think—how can we make this work in our homes, our India?

My Story: Facing the Future at 61

As I write this, I’m 61, living in Bangalore with my wife, Lalitha. Our kids are settled far away—too far for them to ever move back. My siblings? They’re scattered too, and since we’re not from Bangalore, catching up even once a year feels like a distant dream. So here we are, just the two of us, figuring out life on our own terms.

It’s not easy. I’ve spent decade building a business—manufacturing, the kind that needs me on my feet, traveling, meeting people. Physical work has been my fuel. But I know a day will come when my body says, “Enough!” Age creeps up, doesn’t it? And when that happens, how do I stay engaged? How do I keep my mind sharp, my spirit motivated? I’m a High D type—driven, independent, the “I don’t mind, you don’t matter” attitude. I can be an island, happy in my own world. But will that work when I’m 70? Will it be enough?

Mental health weighs on me too. Video calls with the kids and future grandkids are a blessing—technology keeps us close in a way. But it’s not the same as a hug, a shared meal, or their laughter filling the house. That flesh-and-blood touch? It’s fading. Bangalore isn’t helping either—traffic snarls, infrastructure chaos, and the urban mess make meeting friends or even stepping out a battle. In a decade, will I still have the energy to fight through it just to see a familiar face?

Yet, I’m not one to back down. Lalitha and I are resilient—positive, even. Old age is a challenge, sure, but I say, “Bring it on!” I’ve started small—gardening on our balcony, reading more, maybe even picking up a hobby like sketching (though I’m terrible at it!). I dream of a local “chai circle” where folks my age swap stories, or maybe mentoring young entrepreneurs with whatever wisdom I’ve got left. The trick, I think, is to keep moving—physically, mentally, emotionally—even when the world feels far away.

This is my story, but maybe it’s yours too. Living longer is a gift, but it’s up to us to fill those years with meaning. I don’t have all the answers yet. How about you—how will you face your golden years? Let’s figure it out together, one step at a time.

Karthik

3rd March 2025

9am.

What Indian Managers Can Learn from Global Leaders: A Perspective from Experience.....

 #627

My wall at workdesk (2000-2012). The Picture at Top Left -Shravan 1999 worked and gave me. 

The recent meeting between Ukrainian President Volodymyr Zelensky and American leaders Donald Trump and JD Vance at the White House has highlighted the nuances of multicultural engagements. Such interactions provide a valuable lens into the leadership styles and professional practices that define successful global professionals. For Indian managers, especially those who have not had the opportunity to work or engaged in overseas interactions, there are significant lessons to be learned from how leaders in global settings conduct themselves, make decisions, and drive results. Today in a globalised/ intertwined world, these are good to know stuff. 

Having worked with and observed professionals across various continents, I have noticed certain virtues that set them apart—practices that Indian managers can adopt to enhance effectiveness, efficiency, and long-term success.

1. Punctuality and Early Start to the Day

Time is a valuable resource, and successful leaders across the world respect it. American professionals, in particular, start their day very early, leveraging peak energy levels for maximum productivity. Indian managers can benefit immensely by adopting a structured and disciplined approach to time management.

2. Hands-on Approach and a Big-Picture Mindset

Global leaders and managers focus on understanding the broader vision rather than getting lost in micromanagement. They trust their teams to handle execution while ensuring alignment with strategic objectives. Indian managers must strike a balance between detail orientation and maintaining an overarching perspective.

3. Regular Coaching and One-on-One Feedback

A hallmark of strong leadership is staying connected with the team. Frequent coaching sessions and one-on-one discussions help leaders understand challenges, provide guidance, and drive performance. Indian managers often rely on annual appraisals; a shift to regular, informal feedback loops can significantly improve team alignment.

4. Cascading Goals for Organisational Alignment

Setting clear objectives and ensuring they cascade down the hierarchy ensures that everyone understands their role in achieving business goals. This practice fosters accountability and ownership at every level.

This 2006 frame exist even now, above my bed. Drives me for past 20 yrs. 

5. Results and Behaviour Alignment

Delivering results is crucial, but global professionals also emphasize the behaviours and values that drive these outcomes. In many global corporations, even if an employee meets targets but exhibits negative behaviour (e.g., poor teamwork or ethical concerns), their growth is stunted. Indian managers should integrate behavioural expectations into performance assessments.

6. Professional Boundaries in Personal Matters

While personal connections exist, most global professionals maintain a clear distinction between work and personal life. They show concern but do not let emotions interfere with decision-making. Indian managers, often deeply involved in personal aspects, can benefit from a balanced approach.

7. Praising in Public, Correcting in Private

Encouragement boosts morale, and leaders understand that public recognition enhances motivation. At the same time, constructive criticism is usually given privately. However, as seen in cases like Zelensky and Trump, public reprimands happen when necessary. Indian managers should adopt a culture of appreciation while addressing issues tactfully.

8. Direct, Honest Feedback

Effective leaders provide timely and straightforward feedback. The ‘sandwich method’ (mixing praise with areas for improvement) is commonly used to ensure employees feel valued while understanding where they need to improve. Indian managers can benefit by fostering a culture of open, honest, and constructive feedback.

9. The Power of Documentation

In global corporations, ‘if it is not documented, it is assumed not done.’ Clear documentation and communication ensure transparency, accountability, and clarity in decision-making. Indian managers often rely on verbal commitments; incorporating strong documentation habits will enhance organisational efficiency.

10. Structured Meetings and Calendar Discipline

Impromptu meetings are rare in professional global settings. Meetings are scheduled in advance, ensuring proper preparation and time management. Indian workplaces, where ad hoc discussions often disrupt workflow, can benefit from adopting structured scheduling practices.

11. No News is Bad News

In the global business environment, silence on critical issues is considered a red flag. Proactive communication is expected, especially when challenges arise. Indian managers should encourage transparent communication to avoid last-minute crises.

12. Encouraging a Questioning and Challenging Attitude

Healthy debate and intellectual discussions are encouraged in high-performing teams. No idea is dismissed outright; employees are encouraged to challenge perspectives and propose solutions. Indian managers should foster an environment where questioning is seen as a sign of engagement rather than insubordination.

13. Risk-Based Thinking

Effective leaders assess decisions from a risk perspective—considering financial, operational, and human resources factors—and develop mitigation plans. This approach helps in proactive problem-solving rather than reactive firefighting.

14. Meeting Deadlines with Clear Communication

Deadlines are sacrosanct in global workplaces. If there’s a risk of missing them, proactive communication is expected well in advance. Indian managers can benefit by enforcing stricter deadline adherence and ensuring timely updates to stakeholders.

Embracing Best Practices for Success

As someone who has worked with professionals across Europe, Asia, North America, Australia, and Latin America, I can confidently say that successful organisations seek employees who embody these traits. Indian managers who incorporate these global best practices will not only elevate their leadership effectiveness but also drive sustained business success.

The meeting between Zelensky, Trump, and JD Vance at the White House is a reminder of how global leadership interactions shape decision-making, diplomacy, and professional engagement. In today’s globalised corporate environment, learning from such interactions is crucial. By integrating these learnings, Indian managers can build stronger, more efficient, and globally competitive teams. The world is evolving, and adopting proven leadership strategies will ensure that Indian professionals are well-equipped to thrive in an increasingly competitive landscape.

My Personal Traits Picked Up from Corporate Life

1. I wake up at 3 AM and hit work by 8 AM, making the most of my energy levels. I benefited immensely from feedback from my managers/ peers/ colleagues. The reward is so enriching. They were never afraid to speak their mind. 

2. Calendar management is key—everything actionable is scheduled.

3. All my engagements, including calls (even family calls), have an agenda and expectations sent out clearly well in advance. Surprises however joyful are irksome for me. 

4. I set annual personal and professional goals, review them at year-end, and share them with key opinion-makers who influence me.  

5. My results orientation is not just about what is achieved but how it is approached and executed—this is a sacrosanct activity for me.

6. As a father and consultant, I know my red lines even in family matters, and maintain clear professional and personal boundaries.

7. My objective is to praise people as much as possible—people come to work with good intentions, and any fault from their end usually stems from a lack of communication by the organisation or the supervisor. Blame fixes nothing; mistakes are part of life.

8. Radical candor is key—yes, it may appear insulting, but that’s reality. Take it, get on, move on, and grow a thick skin.  As a High "D" I DON'T MIND-YOU DON'T MATTER. 

9. Challenging the status quo and defying norms is my hallmark. I have always believed in bending the law and breaking the rules—if you excel in delivering results, no one cares about the path you took.

10. Everything in life involves risk (even marriage and relationships), so mitigating risk with a solid plan and measurable, results-oriented actions is essential. 

Karthik

2nd March 2024. 

Even Homer Nods: Handling a Bad Day at Work and Life with Grace........

 #626

There comes a time when even the most disciplined and composed among us face a bad day. For some, it may be a rare event—once in a decade at work, perhaps—but in personal life, it is more frequent. The unexpected mishap, the forgotten commitment, or an unforeseen challenge can set off emotions ranging from frustration to outright rage. It happened to me today.

Our wedding day 18/1/25. (Boquet from the 4 Children, hahahh! As Radhu would say-" I do all the hard work of ordering+ Payout; I ought to write other 3 names (Shr, San, Esh)" ehheheheh!!) 

As someone who is a stickler for time, Clockwork routine, I expect precision in everything and I excel in that. (Traits of High "D", + Sagitarian)  This morning, my well-established routine was disrupted—Lalitha forgot to give me my protein drink at 6 AM sharp, (Her Parents arrived 530am and she was engrossed in catching up) and it only arrived at 7 AM. That hour of delay during my morning walk, felt like an eternity, ( I was hungry, having had my Black coffee at 3am; hunger, takes you to uncharted frontiers) throwing my rhythm off. Was it a life-altering event? Certainly not. But in that moment, it felt significant, and I was livid. Yet, I held my tongue, ( I am becoming a matured person with Appreciation/ gratitude) though my face betrayed my disappointment.

Even leaders at the highest levels have bad days. Take this past week for President Trump—several avoidable blunders put him in an uncomfortable position. The Epstein file release fiasco caught  AG, Pam Bondi off guard when she naively trusted the FBI report, only to be blindsided later. The awkward meeting with President Zelensky at the White House didn’t do him or America, any favours. Then came the contentious White House press access issue, raising concerns about selective media admissions—a dangerous precedent if left unchecked. Not a great week for POTUS. But as the saying goes, ‘Even Homer nods’—even the best have missteps.

So, how do we handle bad days?

The key to managing such moments lies in self-awareness, patience, and proactive strategies. Here are a few ways to keep your balance when things go off track:

1) Accept that people make mistakes.

No one is immune to errors. Forgetfulness, oversight, or simple human limitations will lead to occasional missteps. While consistency and discipline are great traits, expecting perfection from others 100% of the time is unrealistic. Instead of assigning blame, recognize that mistakes are often unintentional. Learning to let go of minor grievances can save a lot of unnecessary stress. 

2) Never react in the heat of the moment.

When frustration peaks, the instinct is to lash out—whether through words, body language, or tone. But reacting immediately often worsens the situation. Today, despite my irritation, I chose not to say anything to Lalitha. She realized her mistake, felt apologetic, and a moment of anger could have needlessly soured our morning. The golden rule: when upset, pause. Take a deep breath, hold back impulsive words, and let the moment pass. It’s better to speak with a clear mind than to regret words spoken in haste.

3) Have an open discussion on how to avoid such situations.

The best way to prevent repeated issues is through honest, constructive conversations. Lalitha and I will likely talk later about how to ensure such oversights don’t happen again—not as a blame game, but as a practical way forward. Whether at home or work, simple discussions on expectations and routines can help streamline daily interactions and reduce friction.

4) Honest, candid, and frank conversations lead to solutions.

Effective communication isn’t about assigning fault; it’s about finding solutions. "Seek First to Understand than to be Understood" In the workplace, a bad day can be turned into a learning experience by addressing what went wrong and setting corrective measures. If Trump’s team had a better crisis response strategy, the Epstein file release fiasco could have been handled more deftly. If the White House had a clear policy on press access, unnecessary controversies could have been avoided. The same applies in personal life—when missteps happen, talk openly and honestly. Find ways to fix things rather than dwell on the mistake.

Fool Me Once, Shame on You; Fool Me Twice, Shame on Me

A bad day should be an exception, not a pattern. The goal is not just to handle these situations gracefully but to learn from them. If the same issues recur, then corrective action is necessary. Planning, foresight, and structured conversations can help prevent repeated missteps.

Life is too precious to be derailed by momentary frustrations. A delayed protein drink, an awkward press event, or an oversight at work may cause irritation, but in the grand scheme of things, they are mere blips. The ability to absorb setbacks, respond rationally, and move forward with a lesson learned is what separates those who are effective in life from those who are merely reactive.

So, the next time life throws an unexpected challenge your way, take a deep breath, assess, discuss, and move on. Because even Homer nods, but he always gets back up and continues his journey. I think today's misstep at home could bring me and Lalitha even closer, as has happened many times before. I always tell her, "More we have missteps/ conflicts- More we are getting closer"!! 

Karthik

1st March 2025. (Boy 2 months of the year gone!!)

915am.